Comments on: Who should get your retirement money?

By: Tina

Tina — Sat, 03 Oct 2009 13:37:48 +0000

I feel odd commenting on a post from over a year ago, but I was poking through your site for the first time and can’t resist.

It may not matter who your friend wants to be the beneficiary of her 401k if it is an ERISA 401k – unless her spouse signs a waiver, it will automatically go to him as the surviving spouse. Non ERISA plans like the IRA can still be assigned to other beneficiaries I believe. Hope everything worked out for her!

By: Slinky

Slinky — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 21:42:27 +0000

I’ve just graduated and started at work so I recently went through this debate. I am only engaged, and my fiancee does have some retirement savings of his own. While my mother(divorced) is not well off and has none. She will be relying on social security, and hopefully half my father’s pension and a small rental property. My brother could also likely benefit from the money, but I’m more worried about my mother and he would get it in the event of all three of us going.

I thought long and hard about who should go first or if we should go half and half or what. In the end, my fiancee went on first and my mother as secondary. Why? For a few reasons. I promised my fiancee I would help him accomplish certain goals. I want to keep that promise even if something happens to me. I also know that he would help take care of my mother if she needed it. She also has my brother and her own boyfriend (or whatever you want to call it when an older couple move in together with no intention to marry).

In any case, I agree that need and peace of mind should play the biggest role in the decision. Just like any other money, put it where it does the most good and brings you the most happiness.

By: karla (threadbndr)

karla (threadbndr) — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 17:51:47 +0000

I may be old fashioned, but I think that once you are married, you should be each other’s beneficiary. At that point, you go from being two households (even if you are already under one roof) to one.

I think it may be a generational thing, though. My son told me he would change his designations to half me (he’s an only child) and half his (future) wife until they had kids. That rather took me aback, actually, as I had expected him to put her on everything right away.

By: Ashley @ Wide Open Wallet

Ashley @ Wide Open Wallet — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 18:43:27 +0000

I made my DH my beneficiary as soon as we were married.

By: Leanne

Leanne — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 18:33:36 +0000

That is an interesting discussion. I am 36, never married and no kids, so I have made my niece and nephew the beneficiaries of my accounts. My brother and his wife are doing fine financially, so I think it would help the kids out for college or getting started in the real world if they needed it.