Comments on: Giving Financial Gifts to Family http://www.countingmypennies.com/2009/06/11/giving-financial-gifts-to-family/ Thu, 09 Feb 2012 06:02:48 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Lorena Saurel http://www.countingmypennies.com/2009/06/11/giving-financial-gifts-to-family/comment-page-1/#comment-9930 Lorena Saurel Mon, 12 Apr 2010 18:37:44 +0000 http://www.countingmypennies.com/?p=1176#comment-9930 Thanks a bunch! That was very helpful, I just Dugg your site. Thanks a bunch! That was very helpful, I just Dugg your site.

]]> By: Michelle http://www.countingmypennies.com/2009/06/11/giving-financial-gifts-to-family/comment-page-1/#comment-3564 Michelle Thu, 11 Jun 2009 11:43:12 +0000 http://www.countingmypennies.com/?p=1176#comment-3564 I feel comment-happy today - usually I lurk, but I've got something to say about Everything! HA...my mom (widowed) is extremely fair to the point of pain sometimes. 2 years ago, my uninsured younger brother had an emergency appendectomy - putting him into $15K of medical debt. Mom had the money, paid the bills and sent us other three of siblings checks for $15K, $45K that we felt no entitlement to have and didn't need. None of us cashed the checks and gave them back to her in a Christmas card - seriously, because one of your kids went through a trauma that could have wrecked his finances, doesn't mean my 63 year old mom should short her retirement/savings by such a big chunk! Baby bro (who was 22 at the time of the surgery) feels a little guilty about the money and keeps trying to pay mom back, but he didn't realize (until we told him!) 1) sis and I both had similarly costing weddings 2) other brother lived with mom well into his late 20's saving 10,000's on rent (like average rent at $500 X 7 years = 42K?!) 3) what goes around comes around and 4) feeling 'guilty' is just a sign that he's becoming a fiscally responsible adult who wants to handle his obligations! oh, and 5) he lives closest to said mom and will be handling her day-to-day if anything should happen. I agree with the article - if you want to help family without appearing unfair, pay for food for their table and keep their lights on - but above that you do sometimes have to play politics and hope your family is apprciative/understanding of your choices. I feel comment-happy today – usually I lurk, but I’ve got something to say about Everything! HA…my mom (widowed) is extremely fair to the point of pain sometimes. 2 years ago, my uninsured younger brother had an emergency appendectomy – putting him into $15K of medical debt. Mom had the money, paid the bills and sent us other three of siblings checks for $15K, $45K that we felt no entitlement to have and didn’t need. None of us cashed the checks and gave them back to her in a Christmas card – seriously, because one of your kids went through a trauma that could have wrecked his finances, doesn’t mean my 63 year old mom should short her retirement/savings by such a big chunk! Baby bro (who was 22 at the time of the surgery) feels a little guilty about the money and keeps trying to pay mom back, but he didn’t realize (until we told him!) 1) sis and I both had similarly costing weddings 2) other brother lived with mom well into his late 20′s saving 10,000′s on rent (like average rent at $500 X 7 years = 42K?!) 3) what goes around comes around and 4) feeling ‘guilty’ is just a sign that he’s becoming a fiscally responsible adult who wants to handle his obligations! oh, and 5) he lives closest to said mom and will be handling her day-to-day if anything should happen.

I agree with the article – if you want to help family without appearing unfair, pay for food for their table and keep their lights on – but above that you do sometimes have to play politics and hope your family is apprciative/understanding of your choices.

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